Mom, I have been sleepless for two nights.
I wish I was thinking of something, or even remembering a memory, but it doesn’t seem to be the case.
I’m just there, thinking of nothing.
When I do fall asleep, I long to see you.
I want to walk with you in green fields and along the coasts of a sunny beach.
Instead, everyone else I know seems to come into my dreams.
As tired as I am, I still walk around with a smile on my face.
Sometimes, I feel so strong.
Sometimes, I feel that I will just evaporate into the cold winter air.
People have been treating me kindly.
I have been trying to do the same.
You have always told me to be a good person, and day by day I learn to understand what you meant.
Day by day, there are more things to do
And soon, I will be pushing away the grief inside of me and filling with other things.
I dread that day where I might not be able to remember your face.
Yours always,
Ridia
Ridia's Green Barley 